Go To Girl

Emmy's favorite bath time toy is a cup. She loves to fill it up with soapy water and pour it down her face and in her mouth (yuck). Last night, while doing this, a little water must have gone down the wrong pipe and she choked. As she was trying to catch her breath she tried to climb out of the bath into my arms. All the while, I'm awe-struck by the fact that, in her time of need, Emmy's first instinct was to reach for me.

(Sidebar: Lest any of you think I'm a terrible mother for pontificating on the meaning of motherhood while my daughter is choking, let me state that this all happened in approximately 1.5 seconds. It was over as quickly as it started and she was back to playing with her beloved cup.)

It is important that throughout her life, Emmy have a network of people that make her feel safe and to exchange love with like her father, grandparents, aunts, uncles, etc. But I get a special (read: selfish) kind of joy from being her comfort figure. I hope to always be that "go to" person in Emmy's life (and, if I'm lucky, future children as well).

I know that in time, Emmy will reach her teen and young adult years and we will both struggle while she seeks out independence. And once she finds that independence, she'll likely go on to have her own family. My hope and goal is that no matter where she finds herself in life, she will always know that I love her in the unfaltering, never-ending, abounding, magnificent way that only a parent can. My arms and lap are always open for her to crawl into for love and security. I will be her safe-place.